Dí·a de los Muer·tos
1 : the day of the dead
2 : a holiday, particularly celebrated in Mexico, which focuses on gatherings of family and friends to pray for and remember friends and family members who have died
The fabric roof recedes behind my head in silent automation and reveals the stars in the heavens in all their glory. A moment of solitude and infamy which is quickly interrupted by the speeding commuter train on its elevated track, with its onslaught of light and noise, rushing off to unknown destinations. At the end of my shift I sit behind the wheel of my personal vehicle and take a deep breath – finally it’s over – and listen to the engine cycle into a familiar purr to tell me that it’s ready for the drive home.
I recline the driver’s seat to stare straight up at the infinite expanse of the universe and wonder where the three dead souls have gone this night. It wasn’t my fault, I mean seriously, how am I supposed to reverse multiple years of abuse in the fifteen minutes I’m with a patient? Well, the last one was probably my fault, I pushed him a little too hard, but even still – it was his time to die.
Any why does it always come in threes?
Precision German engineering growls back at me as I depress my foot and accelerate away from the deployment center. Cold wind rushes past my face and street lights streak overhead as the flappy paddles on the steering wheel cycle the gears up in a desperate attempt to distance myself from the memories of a day from hell. Three hundred and thirty-three horses are unbridled at the on ramp to the freeway, with a rapid acceleration, as the increased g-force pushes me into the seat. The cold wind bites at my short sleeves and exposed skin – it’s a little too cold for a convertible ride so late at night – but I did it on purpose knowing full well what to expect. I wonder if that’s what a cutter says as she drags the razor blade in ever increasing depth across her forearm? Does pain and discomfort somehow remind you that your alive and in that revelation then become a celebration of life? Or is it time to check myself into Emergency Psych Services on a 5150 – should I start to worry when the madness actually starts to make sense?
“Medic-40 copy code three for the OD on the transit bus. PD is on scene, Code-4, you’re clear to enter.”
We’re only a few blocks away and Kevin puts us behind the bus and fire engine in just a few minutes. As we walk up to the bus I see a man in his early thirties surrounded by county sheriff officers and firefighters. He’s looking at me in this kind of thousand yard stare as the fire medic shows me the empty bottle of vodka they pulled out of his pocket. It’s the classic “drunk on the bus” and I’ll have to take him to the ED because he can’t even walk by himself. It takes four of us to pick him up and plop him on the gurney and the firefighters take off without even taking vitals or offering to help out.
As I strap the seat belts on my new patient I notice a little bit of plastic between his lips. I reach up and pull out a baggie that’s been chewed down so all that’s left is just a few white grains of powder – obviously an attempt to hide a drug possession from the officers. I hand the baggie to the officer and feel for a pulse; strong in the sixties – good for now. “Kevin, I’m good to go as soon as we load up, this could go downhill fast…”
My new patient isn’t answering questions or even acknowledging that I’m here so my only assessment is what I see on him and the monitor. The most obvious options for the white powder are crack cocaine, crystal meth, or heroin. Crack and meth speed you up; heroin slows you down – I really hope it’s the heroin because that’s the only one I can turn off.
We’re a half mile from the hospital when the vomit and head spinning scene from the Exorcist starts up right there in the back of my ambulance. First thing I notice is the heart rate climbing from 66 beats a minute to an incredible 236 in the course of twenty seconds. As I tell Kevin to upgrade to Code-3 the vomiting starts. Now I’ve got bio-hazard all over the back of the rig (not to mention the stench), and all of my focus is on keeping his airway open to prevent him from aspirating vomit into his lungs. I’d love to throw a line in and hit him with a sedative but I can’t do it at the expense of his airway. Well, I guess it wasn’t heroin.
Two minutes later we have him in the ED. Two minutes after that they are throwing the drug box at him to slow down his heart and attempting a gastric lavage to clean out his stomach. Fifteen minutes after that they are doing CPR – his heart had stopped beating when it gave out from fatigue. Twenty minutes after that the maintenance crew is mopping up the vomit from the floor and trying not to disturb the dead body on the table with the sheet pulled over its head.